Homeschooling Changes Lives

When I arrived at the school not only did they refuse to let me take her home, they blamed the whole situation on me for not clearly communicating her issues. Apparently I was expected to subject my daughter to an array of medical tests and get documentation from a doctor in order to qualify for some red tape program so my daughter could have the basic human right to be treated with dignity and respect (I apologize for the rambling; I am usually more concise, but this whole situation still angers me). After many conversations with my daughter, we figured out were the anxiety was coming from. In an assembly the principal told a bunch of elementary students that they needed to do well on the ISTEP so their teachers could keep their jobs. She broke out into tears worried about how a certain teacher she adored would be able to feed her kids if she did poorly on a test!! Can you imagine? I of course went straight to the superintendent, and was chastised for going out of “the chain of command”. And of course they denied the whole thing, even though several other students corroborated my daughter’s version of the story.

These incidents, combined with many others, caused myself and a large handful of other moms to get together and start documenting and sharing things that were happening to our children. We were prepared to present all of this to the school board. Two days before the school board meeting I was in the parent pick up line, in the school parking lot when the school safety officer knocked on my window and asked me to pull out of line. With no cause given, he ran my license and registration in front of the entire parent population and in front of the children. Needless to say, after seeing what happened to me, all of the other parents refused to testify. One week after we made the decision to pull my daughter out of public school, her stomach issues were completely gone and they have not returned since. The health and well being of our children, as well as the morals of those that teach them, is just as important as their academic standings in my opinion.

Without the restrictions of the public school system my daughter has been able to progress from sixth grade math and literature to eighth and ninth grade level work in just one year. She is flourishing and happy and healthy and actually enjoys learning again. It is one of the best decisions I have ever made.

My student did not struggle with being “behind” in public school. She was frustrated by being held to the lowest common denominator. In fact, in the first grade, I was told that she needed to read with less expression and enthusiasm, and that she “needed” to point at each word as she read. This kid was reading chapter books. It would have been ridiculous to slow her down in that manner. Around March of that year, she began asking to be homeschooled, and gave me a list of reasons. All were valid (I worked in the room right next to hers and popped in enough to know she wasn’t exaggerating). We’re in our fourth year of homeschooling now and she can go as deep as she wants when something captivates her (nine months studying China in the second grade, for example). She has plenty of time to explore all her interests, and enjoys all of her subjects. In fact, she’s currently doing math for fun.

Our younger son has experienced much the same in regard to private and public school. He is currently doing quite well in a Montessori school, but he will age out this year. His temperament is not suited to traditional school. He has severe depression, and has difficulty with emotions. Testing for him has indicated that he needs to learn differently. Since we have seen dramatic transformations in our older son as well in his friends in the same program, we are beginning our younger son in the Classical Conversations program in the fall. While we cannot be sure yet if this will be the right program for him, I know that there are plenty of alternative curricula for the homeschool environment in which I know he will succeed.

There have been incredible benefits for our family in the homeschool environment. First and foremost, I am always on top of what my kids should be doing, if they are slacking off, or if they need help. We can schedule field trips at a moments notice, either by ourselves or with other homeschool parents. The homeschool community is quite supportive, giving helpful hints, curriculum opinions, etc. My boys do not have to concern themselves with bullies, teachers’ inappropriate remarks, or any of other many problems at traditional schools.

My only regret is that we did not start homeschooling sooner. My oldest tries to talk about coursework with his friends who remain in public schools, but his friends are often confused. They don’t understand the terms my son has learned in economics, nor can they talk knowledgeably about politics, government, and history. I’m so sorry for those children who remain in the traditional school environment… I’m concerned for their future.

At my request, we had another IEP meeting to find out why she was getting so little help. The response was, “she will be in functional class for the rest of her life anyway, we cannot give her more”. They had already given up on her! We pulled her out, got her therapy through the hospital and local university and worked with her at home. She is now progressing well and even catching up to her age. We were told later by a retired special education teacher in the area that the schools have changed their philosophies. They want to keep children in the special education classes because that is how they get their money. There is no benefit in improving children’s abilities. Made me heart sick! And thankful to be done with it!

Our oldest daughter attended public school K-2, as I was tutoring four days a week from 3-9pm.  I almost never saw her because she had homework nearly every night in second grade. Our bright, bubbly, social girl had become withdrawn and wasn’t making the best grades. The one-size-fits-all education pattern wasn’t working. We had already decided to homeschool our second child, so we decided to bring home our oldest as well. It wasn’t until much later, when our oldest was homeschooling, that we learned the gym teacher used to pick on her.  Let’s just say it’s a GOOD thing that information was pretty old by that point in time.

Now, in our tenth year homeschooling, the oldest daughter has had the time to hone talents that will allow her to pursue a business of her own upon her graduation, just a few weeks away.

Other benefits include: allowing the children time to get the sleep their growing bodies need, accelerating or slowing down concepts as my child needs (particularly with math), homeschooling at grandpa’s house – where we can still accomplish our schoolwork, but also help him in ways he is no longer able to do work for himself, working at grandma’s business and learning first-hand how a business runs, taking a vacation in the off-season and enjoying not being at the mercy of the public school calendar and the crowd, actually having family time in the evening because we DON’T have several hours of homework… the list is endless.

One of the best things, which we couldn’t have expected until this stage where we are about to launch a child into the world, is seeing how our children have grown, developed, and matured, and having been able to participate in a variety of activities with truly exceptional young people without the pettiness, bullying, peer pressure, and drama that is so prolific in the public school system.

When I first learned of home education in the late 1980’s, I thought it was the weirdest thing of which I had ever heard. Why would anyone want to stay home with her children all day? My oldest was strong-willed, and I couldn’t wait to send my kids to school.

Providentially, the Lord had a friend give me the book by Mel & Norma Gabler entitled, What Are They Teaching Our Children? It was a real eye opener. I thought to myself, “NO WAY are they teaching that to MY children!”

Another friend was going to hear Gregg Harris present a Basic Homeschool Workshop in Springfield, OH, and I went along ONLY to keep her company. As I listened to him speak, the Lord changed my heart about homeschooling as I came to understand more about it. I went from someone who was anti-homeschool to serving on the Board of Directors for Indiana Association of Home Educators many years later. Doesn’t the Lord have a sense of humor? I am sure He was laughing the day I went to the seminar.

Homeschooling has been a huge blessing to our family. There is so much that could be shared, but I will focus on only one aspect. I never enjoyed math in high school and never took a math class past Algebra II. My son excelled in math and science. He received an SAT score that was high enough that he did not have to take college math. After he graduated from his college with honors, he passed the four CPA exams. He developed a new interest in finance. He was accepted into grad school with a scholarship, but has decided not to attend and to study on his own for the three Chartered Financial Analyst (CFA) exams which he passed.

Some people think that they must be experts to teach a subject. Our family is proof that is not the case. It just takes love, commitment, and perseverance to educate your child.

I got interested in home education because my three best students at Ball State University were homechool graduates. Later on, when we adopted our 15-year-old daughter, she was not doing well academically, but after graduating homeschool, she was accepted to and then graduated from Butler University.

After high school, I earned a B.A in Music through an online program in two and a half years. It was during my time in online classes that I began to realize what an incredible gift I had been given. It was extremely obvious who had been homeschooled and who had not by the kind of work that was submitted; although I realize this might not be the case in every situation. Our public school counterparts often submitted careless, tardy work, while those who had been homeschooled usually went above and beyond our professor’s expectations.  I never once struggled with meeting college expectations even if it did stretch and grow me. Although there were some things that I had not been taught to do in high school, my being homeschooled gave me the ability to learn independently which was a tremendous help.

After college, I continued to realize how this ability to learn on my own and having a good work ethic helped in so many other ways, including at my job and the volunteer work I have done. I would not be the person that I am today if my parents had not homeschooled me or if they had not had the freedom to choose how they would educate me, including what materials to use.

1. I realized how little control/power I had as a parent or my child had as a student. Even our beloved teachers had very little power against BIG education (big education money), high stakes testing, the Teacher’s Union, politically correct/anti-God indoctrination. I was dumbfounded. I had no idea. We were in a “good” school, “good” neighborhood and still, no say-so, no voice.
2. Fundraising. The schools still want your time & energy towards raising money, even if it’s “free” public school. And, by the way, still had to pay fees that were close to $300 for both kids… per year.
3. Time. The kids were on the bus by 7 am, home by 2:30, and then an hour of homework in first and third grade!! After homework, the kids were free to play before we ate supper then headed off to outside activities or church. Bedtime was early to be able to make the 7a.m. bus. Dad would get to spend very little time with the kids.
4. Indoctrination. As a believers in Jesus Christ, public school curriculum often conflicted with our family values & beliefs. Theories such as evolution, or global warming/climate change were being taught as fact/ “the right answer”. Weekly, time was spent explaining and unwinding what they were taught by authoritative teachers.
5. We want our children to have a strong faith…that takes time & intention. We want them to know the Bible but also experience God’s presence every day, cultivating a relationship with Jesus. It’s beyond Wednesday night youth group or Sunday School.
6. Learning opportunities! World History in chronological order, living books with time to read them, Latin, traditional (old school) math, field trips… lots & lots of real, hands on experiences, and so much more!
7. Able to avoid high stakes, high anxiety testing.
8. Family togetherness. We LOVE all the time we get to spend together! And we especially love snuggling on the couch while we dig into a good book.
9. Character development. What Charlotte Mason describes as “laying down the rails”, by homeschooling we are able to nurture good life habits & skills and work on loving each other better. Those things take time and we have the whole day. Being away from the public schools has kept their ears from hearing and hearts from absorbing as much filth. Yep.
10. Safety. It was after Sandy Hook that we pulled them. I am not a fearful person but for all the reasons mentioned above plus the real possibility of NO ONE BEING ABLE TO STOP A GUNMAN if they came into the kids school, a “safe zone”, we  knew that there was no one more qualified to safeguard our kids than we were.

Homeschool has been the biggest surprise and biggest blessing of my life. I didn’t seek it…but it found me. I never even imagined it…but it has become a vivid example of God’s goodness that is “exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think” (Ephesians 3:20).

I have had the unique opportunity in my life to teach in many different settings. I began teaching private music lessons when I was in the eighth grade, and by the time I was a senior, I was a cadet teaching beginning band. I spent four years teaching at an Amish Parochial School, where I taught four grades, all in the same class.  This taught me volumes about time management! After that, I taught in the public school system. There was pressure there to teach more to the state test.  Merit pay was first discussed, and teachers were going to be assessed by their students’ performance on these tests. Since I went from teaching four grades to just one, I knew how to set up my classroom to reach more students, hopefully.

Now, we homeschool and I have to admit, it is the most rewarding form of education for us.  Even though I served on writing and curriculum teams, it’s nice to have total control over the curriculum I teach. I love that I have the freedom to put God first in my children’s education. When in public school, I could only share my faith when asked by my students.

Homeschooling gives me the freedom to push my children to reach for the stars. It gives them the opportunity to learn through real-life experiences. None of us know what the future will bring, but I hope I have and will continue to equip them, with God’s grace, with the tools to succeed in whatever life holds for them.

 I tried to work it out with the school. I did not expect to homeschool. We made many suggestions (reasonable ones based on my own 7 years of experience as a public school teacher, and on my mom’s 20+ years of experience). The principal told me that the school could not meet the needs of a highly intelligent child. He told me many other things, but that alone was enough for me. I don’t agree with it, but if that’s what the principal tells me, I’m going to take it at face value.

The worst part is that while my son is advanced in many areas, the one area where he struggles is in spelling, and the school had decided that they would no longer teach spelling (beyond using “word walls,” which are not designed to teach spelling and are not known to be effective). Imagine a six year old child who reads and comprehends at a sixth grade level, talks about particle physics and reads reference books on stuff like mushrooms, but can’t spell a three letter word, and you’ll understand the disparity in his abilities. The principal told me that the reason they weren’t bothering with spelling is because #1, it’s not on the ISTEP, and #2, kids can just use spellcheck.

First grade, we didn’t have him on medication.  My daughter was then in the pre-kindergarten program.  My son did fine until a month or so into school.  One day as his teacher put him in the van, the teacher asked me what medications he was on.  When I replied none, the next day I was informed that we needed a parent-teacher conference.  The conference consisted of his kindergarten teacher, first grade teacher, principal, and special education teacher.  They emphatically said we needed to have our son on medication and it was no different than taking an allergy pill.

We felt a call to homeschool him.  We had thought of it before but didn’t want to be one of those people.  We had a very biased view of homeschooling.  We were then realizing that we had no control over what was going to happen to our son if we left him in school.  We were also seeking help through Miriam Bender which we wanted to see if it worked. We withdrew him at the end of the first semester but used the books from school to homeschool him for second semester.  We left our daughter in pre-k.  We didn’t know after the second semester if we were going to continue homeschooling, but began to notice that we did enjoy homeschooling.  We also liked the freedom of being able to school, take vacations, and use the curriculum which best suits our child’s needs.  Every year, we discuss if we are going to continue to homeschool or not.  Every year, we do.  We have been for 9 years now.  There have been some challenges but there have also been so many rewards.  We never dreamed in a million years that we would be one of those people–homeschoolers–but here we are.

I had always thought about teaching my children. Not only had I wanted to become a teacher, but a mother as well, and home education just fits.

My husband and I want to teach our children what they not only need to know to graduate, but to succeed in life after home. After a few years of struggles with my oldest at a young age, trying a public preschool, and looking into public kindergarten, we felt best teaching him at home. In the public system, the teacher told me, they wanted him reading before he was out of kindergarten. My son struggles with that, so we waited. I’m so glad we did! We took baby steps teaching him, not just sight words, but phonics and the fundamentals that he would need even after learning to read, and he loves it now! At the beginning, when we had tried to do it “society’s way,” there were so many tears and frustrations; it was a miserable time for all of us. By teaching at home, we get to guide them into responsible adults; not just with a full education, but a well rounded knowledge of how to survive. I never have to worry about their social skills; they are polite in public, ask strangers if they need help, hold open doors, and all that is learned by watching. I am so glad we are able to homeschool. It’s the best decision we keep making year after year.

Now, 15+ years later I am still using strengths that were developed because of the education I crammed into my high school home education. I work as a teacher in a cooperative school, teaching sewing. I work also as a seamstress, designer, and sewing machinist. This all stems from the fact that my education in high school was tailored to fit who I was and how I best operated. I hope this for my own children: that home education is still not only legal but supported, that my children be able to grow to be unique individuals that will bless this country, and make stable, interesting adults.

At this point I found out she had been putting him at the “time out table” because other students distracted him and he couldn’t complete his work. So my 5 year old, who already dealt with self esteem issues, was made to feel like he wasn’t good enough. In the phone call she suggested taking him to the doctor and get him medication. I told her I would rather hold him back first and and get him tested. I filled out the paperwork to retain him. That was the plan, until my husband got a promotion and we moved three hours away.

Originally I had looked into k12 online school but it didn’t fit our family. So I made the big decision, the best decision I ever made for our family, and I began homeschooling in July 2014. I restarted kindergarten with my oldest and halfway through the year we were able to start first grade with the PACE’s from A.C.E. Since then I have had him tested at Riley Children’s Hospital and with the local school. He does not have ADD or ADHD. He has anxiety, a reading disability that he is overcoming, and he also was diagnosed with b/d confusion.

My son does not need medication like his previous teacher had suggested. He needed a loving environment where he could thrive in his learning and not feel like he’s being compared to all the other students. My son would just be completing 1st grade in public school because of his reading. That’s where they have him on his IEP with the local school for speech therapy. I consult with the special education department once a month since he does have the reading disability, and they suggested resources that are good for him. However, I had already found my own similar to what the school uses for reading. It did upset me though when I mentioned he was in second grade not first, because they said they would keep it as first on the paperwork if he went back to public school. I mentioned I homeschool most of the year and he’s catching up. They were worried about if he was in 3rd grade next year in a public school that he wouldn’t do well on ISTEP. I was angry that their concern wasn’t my son but ISTEP.  Instead of ending first grade he is finishing up the first half of his second grade curriculum with straight A’s in the four subjects.  He’s doing so wonderfully!!! I couldn’t be prouder of the progress he has made.

My second son is getting ready to finish his kindergarten curriculum. He’s also doing great. Homeschooling allows me to adjust our schedule so my oldest two can visit with their dad three hours away. It allows us to be able to sleep in on Mondays after we make trips for my husband to go visit with my step son who is in the hospital battling leukemia for the second time. Thankfully, we had already made the decision to homeschool when he was diagnosed the first time. It allows us to make doctors appointments and not have to worry about missing school.

There are so many things I can do with my children that I wouldn’t be able to do if they were in school. I even get in extra school days. We now have a year membership to COSI, the science museum in Ohio, for when my husband is at the hospital with my step son. The kids love science, and they love learning about nature too. I have noticed my little three year old sees his big brothers doing their school work and he wants to do his school work too. I have him working on learning colors and counting and he loves it. Not only are my children doing well, they also love being homeschooled. They love the homeschool group and the field trips we do. One of the other homeschool kids is even on the soccer team with two of my younger children. I’m thankful for the right that we have to be able to homeschool our children. I get more precious moments with them and  watch them learn and grow.